Directions to Alyson's House

• Take the first turning on the left.
   

• Keep going straight until you reach the bridge.
   

• Cross the bridge and keep going until you see Burger King.
   

• Cross the road and take the alley past the Burger King car park.
   

• Avoid the dog - it looks like it might bite.
   

• When you leave the alley, head right.
   

• Watch where you step - looks like somebody's puked there.
   

• Take a left at the T-junction.
   

• Keep going until you reach the garage.
   

• Enter the garage and buy some polo mints - they're on special offer.
   

• Leave the garage and follow the small path through the field.
   

• Get a move on - we haven't got all day.
   

• When the path ends turn right.
   

• Go straight past the bus stop next to the river.
   

• Turn left at the train station.
   

• Take the next right.
   

• Hmmm...  should have passed it by now.
   

• This doesn't look familiar at all.
   

• Perhaps we should have gone right at the train station.
   

• This is definitely wrong.
   

• Ask that man for directions.
   

• Shit, he's pulled a knife!
   

• Shit...  Oh, shit... Give him all your money for God's sake!
   

• Look at him - I think he's drugged up or something...
   

• Throw the coins in his face and run!  RUN!
   

• RUN, DAMN YOU!  RUN!